For This Year's Miss April

[xthread]

Dear California,

We give up.

You have been coming up here and driving up our property taxes for decades, buying our hard-built houses with the ill-gotten gains of your booming, out-of-control economy. Imagine, that money comes from building gadgets and making moving pictures, instead of being chopped down or dug up, as God intended!

We hereby formerly acknowledge defeat. We will no longer sit here and jealously guard our borders, intent on keeping you from moving up 'to share the experience.' Instead, we will move en masse and annex the region you have previously referred to as 'Northern California.' Henceforth, it shall be known as 'Really, really Southern Oregon,' or, to some of our most special friends, simply 'Humboldt,' in honor of those few Californians who understand how to properly make a living, through simple toil and the fruits of the Earth.

And we're bringing our Weather.

Sincerely,
Oregon and Washington

Comments

[rubicantoto.livejournal.com]

Glad to have you both! By the way, do you happen to know what all this wet coming from the sky is?

[tshuma]

This made me giggle and force others to read it. Job well done.

[vito-excalibur.livejournal.com]

You are funny as hell!

[woody77.livejournal.com]

4" today, measured downtown. It finally stopped gushing from the sky here about 6pm.

[sierra-nevada.livejournal.com]

I'm sure that quite a number of Californians would welcome OR and WA, so long as it meant OR sales taxes, and WA state income taxes.

Not long ago, there was an article in the SF Chronicle about a bay area exodus to Reno for the cheaper housing and lower taxes. CA is already going for NV's throat with indian gaming (modulo troubles like this).

If NV gifted CA with its weather, the central valley would be a desert, and the coastal range would get 200 to 400 inches of snow every winter.

[gomijacogeo.livejournal.com]

Just great. More rice in the central valley...

[jedusor.livejournal.com]

*giggles* Cute!

[(Anonymous)]

That was hilarious. And to anyone else who doesn't understand it, you aren't sitting in 2 feet of snow on Easter. At least the people who hide the eggs didn't have so difficult a job this year... just toss them out in the yard, and voila! All gone.