More Really Interesting Stuff from John Gottman

[xthread]

Back in 2003 when my marriage blew up, I did an awful lot of relationship research very fast. Unfortunately, we didn't follow aggressively enough on some of the research I did, but I did learn some really interesting basic stuff:

1. Couples Therapy has a horrific failure rate
   
2. Its the best game in town
   
3. There are a tiny number of people getting about a 20% or some such success rate ('success' being defined as 'the couple is still around 1-3 years later, depending upon whose math you use)
   
4. The Gottman Institute seems to have the most serious research-derived models and seems to be getting the best results. Notably, above 70% success rates, which is a damned far cry from 20%.
   

And it seems that the work that the Gottman Institute has been doing has continued on apace. Here is a very recent speech. Wow. Just wow.

Comments

[achinhibitor.livejournal.com]

Once folks learn to let a lot slide, life gets better.

I imagine so.

But how many fractious couples are actually in the state where one or both of them would be better off without the other? Nobody is surprised when it's time for you to get a different employer...